SELF
1.
Laugh with people,
never laugh at people/communities/nations.
2.
Talk with people,
don't talk about people.
3.
Do not be slave to animal instincts. Human beings are an improved model over animals. Animals have no family life, no worthwhile role as father, mother, brother, sister, husband, wife, daughter and son. There are two sub-groups in animals: males and females. Some of us, who indulge in adultery, rape, incest have not yet discarded the animal instincts and have not understood sanctity of marriage and family as evolved by humanity.
4.
An imperfect individual should improve self and not criticise others. We are all imperfect, yet we do not accept our friends, our family members as they are and insist that our friends change themselves as we want them to be. We try to find faults in others; instead we should analyse ourselves objectively, identify our base emotions and improve ourselves. There are always more than one solution to a problem. Let us respect others' solutions to a problem in the family; the spouse, children will feel honoured this way and our family life will have more harmony and peace. Similarly, in any organisation there will be multiple solutions/suggestions offered by employees; analyse these objectively and approve/reject accordingly.
5.
God-made concepts are superior to man-made concepts. Patriotism teaches us that my country is best, because I am born in it. On the same line we all think-- 'my language, my culture, my civilisation, my thoughts, my region, my religion, my family are superior'. All these concepts are man-made; God has made one humanity, one earth and we have subdivided into man-made compartments. Who is right God or we? Let us live as citizen of the world, a part of humanity.
6.
Be a good host or a good guest. Learn how to be a good host or a good guest. A house wife complained of severe headache when told by her husband that his brother was coming for a couple of days; later he corrected himself saying it was her brother who was coming for a couple of days, the headache vanished and she smilingly, enthusiastically prepared for the visit.
*Attitude change can do wonders in life.
*As a host look after daily needs of the guest.
*As a guest we must regulate our activities to minimise additional work-load on the host.
FAMILY
7.
Marriage as an institution has withstood the test of time. Humanity has done a great job in evolving 'marriage' as an institution; in God's world, marriage or an equivalent relationship does not exist in other species. Nowadays, the institution of marriage itself is in danger of being obsolete, due to lack of trust; whereas live-in relationships are flourishing.
*There is/was a black spot in human civilisation, where women had no identity of their own and they were mere shadows of their spouses; this has already been rectified in developed countries and it will be slowly implemented in other parts of the world too. It is a welcome irreversible change.
*But the equality of genders is going too far; women want to indulge in drinking, adultery and other vices; the logic is simple, what men can do, women can do better. Hopefully this trend is reversed and equality of gender leads to curtailing negative traits of men in society.
8.
Greed, morality and tolerance in a relationship/marriage. The spouses should not be greedy of other's finances for personal gains. Lack of trust in each-other, adultery, lack of tolerance of other's views have resulted in frequent divorces. An easy solution found is live-in relationship with no permanent liability.
9.
Nearly same financial status is best in relationships. Relationship/friendship is more comfortable if financially the friends/spouses are nearly equal. However if there is inequality, it needs mature behaviour to live in peace. The spending style of spouses/relations if nearly same, helps too.
10.
Forget and forgive. Invariably we are unable to forget the past hurts and refuse to get rid of this useless baggage in our minds and the next stage to forgive those who hurt us in the past, is seldom realised. It is better to forget and smile than remember and be sad.
11
Family Life. The relationship between spouses, parents and married children gets diluted as we grow old; the warmth in relationship vanishes. We need to correct our attitude and avoid unrealistic expectations from children after marriage. A family means a couple or spouses with unmarried children; parents and married children are part of extended family. Each family is entitled to its own privacy and non-interference from others, who were part of the family earlier, but now belong to extended family. The transition from being member of the family to a member of extended family and its implications are not realised by family members and it leads to unpleasantness.
12.
Friendship with children. Friendship with children is like writing on water, it evaporates, vanishes into nothingness. We all have played with our sons, daughters, nieces, nephews and grand-children in their childhood, and had great friendship with them. When they grow up, we may be totally alien to them, they may not like to be intimate and revive childhood friendship with us. Reconcile with reality and be at peace.
SOCIETY
13.
Make friendship with humble, humane and humorous beings. It pays rich dividends in life if we are 'humble, humorous, humane'; and not egoist, snobbish with 'I am always right' attitude. We can judge a person by observing his attitude, how he/she deals with a person who can do him/her no good. Avoid those who are always cribbing, criticising everybody, for problems in their lives.
14.
We all owe to our friends, family and society. Are we contributing something to society, world at large or we are a parasite, taking full advantage of our friends, relations and giving back nothing in return. Be thankful to the parents who sacrificed their money and time in bringing us up and pay it back in their old age; rather than criticising them for improper upbringing for ever.
GOD
15.
Accept God's creation as it is. God has created the world, reasonably perfect, but mankind is not satisfied; it tries to out-smart God:
*We wear dresses, unlike animals who live as per God's design; this is understandable as an essential feature of human civilisation.
*Our dentures are not similar to dentures of carnivorous animals, these are like the dentures of herbivorous animals; so God has designed human-beings as vegetarian. To be non-vegetarian can be accepted as it is the only way to survive in adverse climates.
*Marriage as an institution is an invention of humanity, not designed by God.
*But we go to extremes,
we do not want to be old or at least look old,
we want to live for ever and do not accept death as a desirable design of God. We use hair dye for colour, we try cosmetic surgeries, we try to change our gender, we try to delay our menopause with a view to reach pinnacles of our career, and then be a mother, we even refuse to be a mother and find a surrogate mother. We refuse to live as God has designed our lives, but at what cost?
*Those who live by God's designed instincts (animals, birds, sea life), live more healthy life than those whom God gave intelligence, analysing ability. Man suffers from heart blockages, diabetes, blood pressure, depression, animals don't. Let us live as God has planned for us, it will give us a peaceful journey in life. Be thankful to God for what you have and accept whatever He does.
16.
Friendship with God is the only friendship which is everlasting, consistent and holds our hand in spite of any wrong done by us; God will never disown us, where as our relations may disown us if we commit a heinous crime or spoil the family image.
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